At the cross, at the cross..where I first saw the light!!

In this blog, we will be finding out how my heart was stirred even further by the divine.  Even though I've declared this to be the final of 3 parts..I'm going to add a fourth...Sorry..!! We'll just have to dance in the rain in the next blog..! Honestly, I simply found too many neat insights to cut things short..!! You know what?? Remember that in your study of God's holy and precious word!! There is always more treasure for those who wait on the Lord and allow His words to hide themselves in surrendered hearts. 


If we close our eyes and picture a beautiful night long ago where Jesus started calling... we will get a glimpse of a 19 yr. old college freshman on her bed, listening to God's voice calling in the night, a voice that had called another young college girl long ago to go to Africa!!

I just sat there late into the night..holding my Grandfather's book, sharing a glass of orange juice with him and then reading parts of Fairy Chism's testimony and story. Seeing as how many of you might not know who Fairy Chism was, I'm going to introduce you to her! 

Not only did Fairy Chism go as a single missionary to the continent of Africa, but she served there in the Kingdom of Swaziland for over 20 years in unmitigated surrender! Incidentally, Swaziland is the same location where my Grandfather had served as a medical surgeon in 1961, remember? Listen if you like and hear how God began to tell a story and weave beautiful threads into a tapestry of promise and purpose for my life. There is a calling that had been written for me from eternity, set in time for me to hear and to follow!! Yes, there is a calling that comes from heaven above to those that have said their lives belong to the King...a calling that no matter how hard we might try to drown it out, we will never shake its presence until we are shaken free of all our reservations!  As if every time the wind blows or the spirit within us is stirred, the Spirit is waiting to hear one word from you and from me: Yes!

Alright, so where does Fairy Chism's life touch the story of my life? In order to understand the answer to that question, we will have to first meet the man that would father my Grandfather, the reverend and evangelist for the Church of the Nazarene in the early 1900s, and simultaneously my Great Grandfather, J.T. Little!

How exactly did I come across this unbelievable connection between my Great Grandfather, my grandfather and a young single missionary to Africa? Would you like to hear the tale? Truly, the truth about this tale is that only the Spirit binds us together in ways such as these, Amen? As I said earlier, I had switched my term paper's theme to, "what makes a missionary answer the call to the edge of nowhere and how that call defines the missionary."  Knowing I needed more books on missionaries, I naturally continued my search that night before the library closed. To my surprise, I discovered even more treasures in the PLNU library! To explain, I not only searched for missionaries, but missions books that also mentioned the name, Little. Mostly, I just wanted to see if there were any more materials on my Grandpa to help bring the personal nature of the paper out stronger. Ha..Heaven knows that God was about to make this very personal and soon!!

 After all, the paper was to have a very personal application! Well, surprise, surprise! I had had no idea how personal this paper was going to become. As I searched, 
Touched by the Divine, the Life Story of Fairy Chism popped up with an example of some its text with my Great Grandfather's name in it! Seriously?? Now my family really had some explaining to do about my Great Grandfather, J.T. Little!! Would you like to meet him? J.T. Little was a fiery man of Holiness! To be an evangelist in the early days of the Holiness movement demanded great sacrifice and unyielding dedication to the call some were given to impart the whole truth of God's victory to all that would hear: we are not just saved, but we are saved to the uttermost, held in God's perfect peace through the ultimate act of full surrender.  Well, the victorious message of holiness was given all throughout Nazarene churches and Tent meetings by J.T. Little and other pioneers like him. The photo below is a picture of my Great Grandfather, also known as the "prophetic one of prayer" and his wife, Louella, a picture of strength in her own walk with Jesus, and a few of their 15 children!! 



Alright obviously, Touched by the Divine, was definitely going to be on the pile of books going home with me that night! Finally, I grabbed the other titles that jumped out at me, including the infamous missionary testimony, Through Gates of Splendor, by Elizabeth Elliot! So, there I was that night reading my Grandfather's testimony, and then reading parts of Fairy Chism's call to serve God in total surrender! Truly, I was just riveted by the realization that my Great Grandfather had played such a roll in this great young missionary's understanding of victory and the call to serve God at any cost! Wow! As I began to read about Fairy's shoes wearing themselves down to nothing as she refused to stop praying until her will was surrendered into God's will completely, the tears began to well up and burn my eyes! Almost as if I were the one fighting parts of total surrender and struggling with the reality of being called to go follow the Lord, my heart continued to pound louder and louder so much so that I was scared my roommate would come home and ask me what all the noise was! Here are a few quotes from Fairy's wonderful account of how J.T. touched her life through the Divine work of the Holy Spirit,

On the last Sunday night of the school year Fairy knelt at her familiar place at the altar. That night, however, was different; for Louise Robinson knelt by her side and Brother J. T. Little just across the altar from her. Fairy was encouraged. She felt that surely she would find victory tonight, for Louise Robinson and Brother Little were the greatest pray-ers she had ever known. How good God was to let them both pray for her at the same time! But in vain. After two hours Fairy went home – the school year was ending and she had not been sanctified.
As Fairy walked slowly home that night she talked to the Lord: “If they can’t pray me through I guess no one can. I’m sorry; I’ve done my best. I didn’t want to be lost, but here I am.”
The pungent odor of sagebrush, which she loved, came through the open window that night as Fairy knelt by her bed. “Lord Jesus, I’ve done all I know to get sanctified. Everybody’s prayed for me and it doesn’t seem to do any good. It seems I can’t get the experience. Without holiness no man shall see the Lord. I’ll have to go to hell; but when I meet You, I’ll tell You that I really did my best to find heart holiness. However, I do love You with all my heart and will serve You as long as I live. Simply to know Your will, will be to do it.”

Just there the prayer was interrupted. Into Fairy’s heart there came a sweet rest and peace – a sense of cleansing and complete fulfillment. Later she described her experience: “I was so bent on struggling to die out to self and sin. I wanted to be so sure. And it took all of that struggling for me to get to the end of trusting in struggling and in the prayers of people. Doing, doing was ended. The merits of His doing – the precious shed Blood – dawned on my unworthy heart. Ah, the work was done! Because of Calvary and that alone, the Holy Ghost had come, June 2, 1919.” 


You know something...I can completely relate to all of that struggle!! Fairy's struggle met my struggle that night!! Sometimes we just want to be so sure..but in our own strength..!!! Somehow it just seems safer there...you know?? Doesn't it just blow your mind how easy it is to grab onto people, things, anything, but the unseen..??


2 Corinthians 4:18
So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.


 No..No...No...we are not safe in the seen things..They fade!!! Only are we safe in His arms of love, grace and mercy...!! How do we abide in His arms..??? By letting go of everything else..!!! Friends..let Him consume you!!

Hebrews 12:28-29

New International Version (NIV)

 ²⁸ Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, ²⁹ for our “God is a consuming fire.”^[a]

^{The Reverend J.T. Little was consumed by God's holy fire and absolutely sold out for the cause of Jesus Christ!! Not only did J.T. Little understand that nothing could be left on the table, he also worried not if there was enough food to eat, or money to provide...!! He lived on Jesus Christ as Gain..Christ Crucified..the hope of Glory!! Seriously Grandpa J.T.?? To have had 15 kids and travel constantly to spread the victorious message of heart holiness, you had to have had some fire lighting your way!! I recently uncovered a little bit more about J.T. Little and his wife Louella when I recently read the whole testimony of Fairy Chism!! I'd like to share this story with you in my own words and with use of some direct quotes!! Hopefully, you'll find as I did, God calls, God equips, and God's will, will be done for His call is irrevocable!! Whether God uses a Whale, a disease, a snake, or a worm...He'll never let us go!! Praise His Holy name!!} 

^{Please enjoy reading how God used my Great Grandfather, the surrendered heart of Fairy Chism, and a whole lot of prayer to have His will done in Africa!!}

^{Fairy, a young college girl, attending NNC, which is Now, Northwest Nazarene University, was called to go to Africa!! Fairy, like many of us, doubts. Lord, how will I go? Lord, is this really your will???} So Fairy began asking God to give her a "call." For many months she waited for an answer. Finally she changed her prayer. "If You don't tell me not to go," she prayed, "then I will think You mean I can go." 

Suddenly, Fairy had the ultimate physical test to undergo that I believe sanctified her call to serve in Africa at any cost!! 

It was toward the close of the summer of 1920 that Fairy suffered the only serious illness of her young life. Her body had become dangerously weakened from prolonged fasting in order to learn the will of God for her life while at the same time she had kept up the strenuous work of thinning apples. Typhoid laid her low and for many weeks the outcome of her illness was uncertain.

 Finally all that family and doctors could do proved insufficient, and hope of her recovery was abandoned. The physician told the sorrowing family one morning that Fairy would slip away sometime that day.

Fairy had been unconscious for hours, not knowing when the doctor made his last call. While her loved ones were grieving over the untimely approach of death, Fairy stood outside the gate of heaven. Jesus came out to her for a moment, then returned. Fairy was glad to be so near heaven, but the disturbing thought

flashed to her mind: But I haven't got to Africa yet! I don't want to go to heaven without going to Africa!

As Fairy waited outside the gates of pearl, she felt positively that within they were discussing whether or not this was the time to bring her home. If they should decide to take her now, Jesus would return for her. Long she stood outside heaven, but finally opened her eyes once more on earth. To the weeping family she said, "Don't cry. I'm going to live and work for Jesus."

Now, the reality is that we are supplied with everything we need, according to His riches in Glory..!! 

Philippians 4:19

New International Version (NIV)

¹⁹ And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.

When we walk in His will, in the light of His Word...what joy and peace there is in knowing that nothing will ever keep His plans from going forward!! His Call is irrevocable.  What Fairy needed to learn..What I needed to learn...something J.T. Little had pretty much figured out...God's call is not a matter of if, but a matter of when..!! Yes, all the riches lay in Christ and He is able to complete the plan!! Faith is not trusting that God can..but trusting that God will!!! Faith is knowing that our needs are not based on what we can see..and our needs are not what we think they are...!! We need Jesus..and in Him are all the riches needed to supply a way to carry out His will, His good, pleasing and perfect will!! 

A long time later Fairy learned of the prayer vigil of her pastor, Rev. J. T. Little, whom she had met several years ago in the home mission campaign in Moscow. When the Reverend Mr. Little had heard that Fairy was approaching the end, he shut himself in his room, telling his wife that under no condition was he to be disturbed. For hours he pleaded with God and came out at last with the answer that Fairy would live. Sadly his wife answered, "But Fairy is already dead." (A student had circulated the doctor's report that Fairy would likely not live through the day.)

"No, she cannot be dead!" was his positive reply. "Yes, they say she died about noon today."

Now, I can just see this women of excellence, Louella approaching the door to tell J.T. the bad news. Humble and true, Louella dared to approach J.T. in his bed chamber where he had knelt down to pray in God's power for God's will to be done in Fairy's life and call! Simply put, I'm sure Louella prayed before she dared knock on that door of this fiery, prophetic husband of hers.  Knock..Knock...!! Honey...?? Forgive me for interrupting, but I have some news from the college and church about Fairy!! Oh, how I'm certain she was concerned to give her husband the bad news, as he was praying so fervently! I'm even more certain she was taken by surprise when J.T.'s answer came back with even more vigor and spice! Listen in to J.T.'s fiery response, to which I'm sure Louella's heart skipped a beat! 

"Then if she did, she will come to life. She will live and preach His Word," he said with the confidence of unshakable faith in God.

The next day the doctor came to the house again to see the patient. He could not understand the change. "I have never seen a case like it -- sure and certain signs of death had set in yesterday." Then to Mrs. Chism he confided, "There is something about this case that I don't understand." Perhaps no one quite understood but Brother Little, who had wrestled in prayer for Fairy during the long hours of the day that Death came for her. 

Have you sat at the foot of the cross lately? Have you been captivated by the impossible riches it holds, the power in the blood, and the unshakable nature of His mighty Love and Call?? Worship with me in this Hymn..so close to Palm Sunday and a week of true passion...it's just time for me to be at the cross!! At the cross..Yes, where I let everything go in exchange for more one more glorious than I knew I could have..!! He called me at that cross..and He'll never let me go...!!

We'll continue in blog number 4 with Elizabeth Elliots book, Through Gates of Splendor, where God made it clear..Jennifer was going to be a missionary!! Happy Easter...and remember, even if you don't know how...or when...His call is irrevocable!